How many of you have ever felt stuck in life or a certain area of it? It’s a horrible feeling. When I’ve been in times like that I’ve felt heavy, unclear, hopeless, unsure of where or whom to turn, desperate, frustrated, full of despair, and usually very alone. My hope is that as the year is still a bit new and bright, less of you are feeling this way, but if you are, read on for the best advice I use time and time again.
This quote, by Nancy Levin, is my solace during stuck times: “Movement mobilizes possibility.” It’s evidenced in nature. Envision a dam built by beavers, and you want to start the stream flowing again. Just moving one stick starts that stagnant water moving which helps you see the next best stick and so on and so forth. This analogy is very much applicable to life.
Movement when we’re feeling stuck can come in many shapes and sizes. It can be phoning a friend for help when you never lean on anyone. Or taking a walk at lunch when you usually eat at your desk. It can be interviewing for a totally different type of job, but you’ve been intuitively guided to know your skills are transferable. It can be signing up for a paid dating app when the free ones just leave you disgruntled or it can be shifting one negative internal dialog to positive. It can be interviewing financial advisors when no one in your family has ever used one. When I was in one of my most stuck places about eight years ago, I studied the habits of the world’s most successful and slowly but surely shifted my own over six months.
I ask myself questions like what’s one tiny thing I could do differently? What do I do every day, is that moving me forward? When I don’t get answers, after allowing myself to be annoyed, I pray, meditate, and spend time envisioning the ideal scenario.
Try this exercise out. Pick an area of your life where you feel stuck. Spend five minutes writing down what you don’t like. Then take a nice cleansing breath in and out and allow yourself to vision what the ideal version of this area would look, feel, and sense like. Now take five more minutes and write those details down.
As you allow yourself to see the disconnect between your current reality and what you say you want, ask yourself what’s one tiny step you could take to move in the direction of what you want? Let me know what you decide on, and I’ll support you as you unclog the stream stick by stick.
Email Nicole Beaudin at nicole@eloiandstella.com.
