I am a 16-year-old girl and not on social media. One of the agreements my parents and I made when I got my phone, at age 15, was that social media was off-limits. At first, I found this kind of unfair. I had already waited so long to get a smartphone (longer than all of my other friends) and was tired of being the only one without— and let me tell you: being one of the only high schoolers without a phone didn’t help when all I wanted to do was blend in. I felt so left out of things that happened outside of school hours. Even when I hung out with them outside of school, they were often on their phones.
Most of my friends are on social media: they have Snapchat streaks, send each other Instagram and Tiktok reels and post stuff that I can’t see. They talk about trends, videos that are going viral, and they all know dances I don’t. My friends sometimes complain about it too. ‘I saw this super funny video, but I couldn’t send it to you because you don’t have TikTok’ is something I heard often. When TikTok was banned for a day, my friends were so upset that they bought a cake to celebrate how long their TikTok streak had lasted.
At first, I was very displeased with the fact that I wasn’t allowed social media. However, over time after seeing how much time my friends were spending on apps that didn’t really engage them or help them learn at all, I realized that my parents actually did me a huge favor. If I had been allowed to be on social media, I don’t think I could have managed myself to limit my screen time. I see it in my friends sometimes, the inability to pull themselves away from the screen, sometimes even affecting their ability to turn in assignments on time. I think I would have wasted days scrolling, and become very unproductive overall.
Not having social media definitely sets me apart from other teenagers. Adults often praise me with comments like, “Wow! You’re not on social media? That’s amazing,” while teenagers usually express disbelief, asking how I manage without it and what I do to fill my time. I spend my time playing frisbee, doing schoolwork (junior year comes with a lot of that) and recently, I have been reading a lot more. My favorite genre is historical fiction. I’m learning French and Spanish on Duolingo, and I spend lots of time with my friends.
However, there are drawbacks to not having social media, as well. For example, last summer, I participated in a journalism conference in Washington DC with other sophomores and juniors. The program posted pictures from each day on Instagram, and also had additional information on there about what was going to happen as the weeks went on, and it was not fun to be the only one who couldn’t see the pictures. Also, everyone there asked for my Instagram, not my number, when they wanted to connect with me. It was really hard to be at a networking event, and not be able to network very effectively.
Social media can be a powerful tool for connecting with people and exploring opportunities, especially in professional or educational settings. While I’ve seen the downsides, I also recognize the value of platforms like Instagram for networking and staying informed. For example, during the journalism conference, having an Instagram account could have helped me stay connected with other participants and build relationships that extend beyond the event.
Social media has become an increasingly relevant part of our world, and I could see myself engaging with it in the future. However, because I grew up with a dad who is in the tech industry who knows all the harms that social media causes teenagers—especially teenage girls—I am well aware of the risks and the unrealistic ideals that it promotes. If I decide to use social media in the future, I would approach it intentionally. My primary interest would be using Instagram to network with peers, follow organizations, and discover opportunities that align with my interests. I want to ensure that if I engage with social media, it’s a tool for growth, not a distraction.
Natalia is a Junior at Compass Montessori here in Wheat Ridge. Interning for the Neighborhood Gazette with a goal of government policy work in her future.
